The Weekly Encourager – April 28, 2015 – A Threefold Cord

God's timing is perfect. While Dave and I were wrestling with the most difficult ongoing issue in our marriage, I was asked to give the devotional at a bridal shower! Of course I said yes, knowing that I could trust the Lord for what to say to this bride-to-be, just as I've trusted the Lord to preserve our marriage all these years.

After an honest discussion and earnest prayer, Dave and I gained a bit more insight into our issue and were ready to soldier on. At that point, I told Dave that I needed a handle for the devotional. Marriage is a huge topic, but I needed something I could say in five minutes at a shower. Since the young couple are musicians (as we are), I thought maybe a musical analogy of a “divine duet” or a symphony might work, but I wasn't feeling it. Dave responded that his favorite analogy was the threefold cord that is not easily broken. We had a nice talk about what we've learned in 35+ years of marriage, and that conversation became the basis of this talk.

Here is Ecclesiastes 4:12 in three different translations, each of which adds more meaning. “And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.” - NASB

“And one standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer; three is even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” - TLB

“Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” - NKJV

Dave said this is particularly true when each strand is made of a different material! That's how they make elastic: they combine a stretchy strand with one of load-bearing strength. This achieves a stronger and more flexible rope than combining any single type of cord with others like itself. This is God's principle of biodiversity: compounds are better than single elements, and they make a more sustainable environment. In marriage, sometimes you need to be flexible, and sometimes you need to be strong. There's a cooperative balance: one man, one woman, one God. Dave also told me that a cord performs best when it's tightest!

If you look up “threefold” in a dictionary, you find that it has two main meanings: having three parts or members, and being three times as great or as many. Both apply to marriage.

What makes a Christian marriage stronger and more flexible is being intertwined with that third element, the Lord God of the universe, to guide, support, and protect that union in Christ. God uses marriage as one of His top tools to mold us into the image of His Son, that we may be holy before Him, and fit to do good works for His kingdom. God has a vested interest in keeping couples together, so that they can glorify Him. This is truly a rope of triple strength.

Now for some practical advice from one who has been there. Four words to ponder: pray, priority, practice, persevere.

1. Pray: Your relationship with the Lord is vital. Abide in the vine, for apart from Him your marriage cannot grow. Pray for yourself and for your husband daily; this one habit can make or break your marriage.
2. Priority: Your husband must remain the most important person in your life, above your family of origin, above your children, above your friends, and above your colleagues. Protect your time together. Be his biggest fan and his best friend. Be the lover of his heart's desire.
3. Practice: Develop trust through honesty. Learn the best ways to communicate with him. Find and maintain common interests; they will become a source of joy and companionship into old age. When your husband asks you to do something, submit; God will honor it. Marriage is hard work, but so worth it.
4. Persevere: Promise each other that divorce is not an option. Once you're woven together, that's it. Don't let Satan talk in your ear – he wants to tie you in knots. If you let him, he'll make you so wrapped up in your problems that you're useless. The biggest reasons for divorce are money, sex, and in-laws. Don't let these or anything else come between you. Keep your rope tight. Finally, keep mending the rope; don't let the ends fray. God may have to burn the ends with fire; accept the discipline of the Lord and be grateful. Press on.

At the wedding, when you make that commitment for life, Jesus is standing there with you. He has one arm around each of you as you make your vows, then walk together down that aisle. You are now a threefold cord. “Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate.” A threefold cord is not easily broken, for God is faithful.

God is faithful
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